Alright. I've done it. I joined a matchmaking service.
The service is called elove. It's beaucoup bucks, but they negotiated with me. I'm not at liberty to discuss the agreement, but if you try it out, don't be turned off by the price.
I'm feeling really positive about it! They called me up for a phone interview last week and I went in for my face-to-face interview today. The woman was very genuine, friendly, professional and approachable. She's been matchmaking for 10 years too.
Their process really is fascinating. It's not computerized matchmaking a la eharmony. I did fill out two surveys, but mainly it was about the interview. It was nice to talk to someone about what I wanted in a possible long term relationship. She said that the matchmakers come together with the applicants and literally fight over who should match with who. I heard that RA's are chosen in a similar way. It must be fun living vicariously through their clients, playing matchmaker.
What was a confidence booster for me however, was her reaction when I told her I'd never been in a long term relationship. She said, "but you're so bubbly and friendly." It was nice to have someone who didn't analyze my lack of a boyfriend as due to something wrong with me. She also said I was cute and looked "different" in a good way, like men should be drawn to me when I enter a room. I know that might sound fishy, like she was just feeding me a line, but she really seemed impressed with me and sincere. It's hard to describe. Anyway, she understood the struggles I've been having and reassured me that my experience was normal, that there are lots of people in my boat.
Also, I was so grateful that they cut me a deal. She must have really sold me to her boss. She even said, "I don't want money to keep you from finding love." Again, I know that when you read that online, it might sound like she was just feeding me a line, but I think she really was sincere. My disappointment upon seeing the price must have choked her as it choked me. It was heartbreak, really. Just as I was feeling good that maybe I can be matched, that I'm not such an oddball, that someone can find me a quality man, that there is a lid for the pot that is me, I turned hopeless.
I usually don't feel dejected about my single status and don't become hopeless at the idea that there might be no match for me. However after the stressful two weeks, I've had, after the bad news I've received in the past 24 hours, this was just...I don't know. It was a Murphy's Law moment. "Even a matchmaker can't help me? I really do need to just get this dating stuff out my head."
But now, in 7-10 days, I can expect a call, just in time for my trip to Memphis next weekend :-P. Great. It's expensive, yes, more than eharmony or match.com or any online dating site. However, I think this investment will bring a better return than the money I've wasted on trial online dating memberships. It's clear that after 8 months of doing this on my own, I need help. Online dating just isn't yielding anything serious. I can't find quality men online for free.
Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match...