Sunday, February 7, 2010

Do what's best for you-part two

There actually wasn't going to be a part two, but events today further confirmed this new mantra of mine.

Since Nate, there has been no man who's piqued my interest. I went on a date with Steven in January, and though the date was not bad, there was mutual disinterest, thankfully.

As usual, I started to get fatalistic again, as in "Well, I guess there is no guy for me after all. I should just give up this fruitless endeavor and go on with my single life." I was starting to feel silly for even trying to date. I'm a perpetually single virgin in my mid-twenties after all. How good are my chances of getting a boyfriend, really?

Today I was reminded of the phrase, "there're other fish in the sea." I'm altering my resolution somewhat. I said I'd go on one new date or to one new singles event every month. However, although I enjoyed Speed Dating, singles mixers at bars don't appeal to me (though I've bookmarked some such meetups). I decided that if I want to meet an intellectual sort (who therefore will be more likely to be childfree), I need another strategy for meeting such a guy. I thought about taking a class, but the problem is most classes I'd be interested in taking lack men. So I decided to do something I always wanted to do anyway: join a book club. Dorky? Yes. But even if I don't find a date or boyfriend, at least I'll be doing something I enjoy. If I want to be articulate and charming, I should do things that put me in non-threatening, unintimidating situations.

Well actually, there was a cute, ph.D student in the book club, "Mark." :-) I didn't talk one-on-one with him. Shame on me! Another missed flirting opportunity. But I was in a comfortable setting and did contribute funny and interesting tidbits to the conversation. Made him laugh a couple times, which is always good for building rapport. Will I go after this guy? I don't know. I don't even know if he's single. However, it woke up my inner dater. How silly of me to give up so quickly! Of course there are other men out there. Of course I haven't exhausted all eligible bachelors.

Needless to say, I will be returning to the book club in two weeks, for two reasons. ;-) Even if we're never more than acquaintances, Mark has inspired me to keep trying.

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