Sunday, February 27, 2011

revising the resolution

My New Year's Resolution was to go to bars by myself (starting with once per month and working up to once per week) as well as meeting one new group of people every month.

Sadly, I did not fulfill this month’s bar goal. However, I went on three dates and to several meetups! I attended a Vegan meetup, a gamer meetup and went to two documentary screenings. I'm going to a dance lesson hosted by a young adult group tomorrow. February, despite a life-halting blizzard at the month's beginning, turned out to be busy.

Although I didn't fulfill the bar goal for the month, I think I did manage to "put myself out there!”

Am I any closer to being in a relationship? No. But more importantly, I'm in a good place mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I had a lot of fun this month too, despite not getting further than date #2 with anyone. I enjoyed my date with M over Valentine's Day weekend, yet I felt no sparks toward him, alas. He's a good catch too (if he's telling the truth that is...). He seemed to be more interested in me than I in him. Thankfully, he hasn't called since our salsa date on Monday.

By the way, I did go on a date with my favorite, D, over the weekend, but he turned out to be a let-down in person. I know everyone has baggage, but I can't do a Debbie-downer who's in a kinda-sorta long distance relationship with a kinda-sorta ex right now…

I thought I might need to revise my resolution given the events of February. According to the original plan, I should have gone to a bar alone twice in February and three times in March. Well, I might have to stick to once a month until further notice. Weekly might have to wait until summer, when I have more time. Now, I usually don't feel like going anywhere after dark.

Something I have abandoned in the cold weather is going out to eat and reading at cafes alone. I stopped at a coffeeshop last week to read a book because my computer, TV, and so forth distracted me from reading. Winter turns introverted me into a hermit. But I enjoyed change of scenery, reading at a coffeeshop.

So maybe instead of working my way up to a weekly bar visit, I should work toward going somewhere alone once per week. That's a goal I can fulfill, and I won't feel bad about not going specifically to a bar or meetup every week, every month.

The goal for March, then? Go somewhere alone three times. Next week will be number one: I'm going to a "walking" meetup where we just walk around a particular neighborhood for a few hours. This will be a meetup which I never attended, and might provide opportunities for "first dates." I just have to remember to talk to people other than middle aged women!

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