tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.comments2023-05-08T00:26:08.675-07:00The Virgin Singleflamencokittyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comBlogger109125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-45711783080814260182012-10-11T21:49:46.421-07:002012-10-11T21:49:46.421-07:00Darcy has moved and we are just facebook friends, ...Darcy has moved and we are just facebook friends, but it was still better than Mr. Wickham! No heartbreak, tears and losing sleep. We hung out a few times over summer. I made a lot of "just friends" over summer, which was what I needed! I like what you said about the spectrum of virginity and emotional virginity. I know some people like that, definitely. flamencokittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-75930826663054524292012-10-11T21:44:03.825-07:002012-10-11T21:44:03.825-07:00Casey-My thoughts exactly. Men seize opportunities...Casey-My thoughts exactly. Men seize opportunities, why not us?<br /><br />girl-I know other couples where the woman pushed. And I agree. Trying to follow the rules all the time just drives you crazy.<br /><br />Brandon-Thanks for reading. And yes, I enjoy small groups at my church too. I was going to a church that had a huge young adult population, but it was far too big for me. I only knew 4 people in the group, really. At my current church, the young adult group is smaller, but I feel like I know them better and they do more things I like. Not every event is centered around drinking and mingling with a bunch of strangers. No prospects at church, but a good group. A blessing.flamencokittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-46374681344743074982012-10-02T10:04:07.018-07:002012-10-02T10:04:07.018-07:00Flamencokitty, it's very worth it to keep your...Flamencokitty, it's very worth it to keep your virginity for it goes beyond religious virtue. As a person who got duped into loosing his purity, I can say from the other side that after lost it I felt very used because of my ex-girl friend(who was horrible). I something that was for my future wife was taken away by weakness and manipulation. I know it's not a fantastic answer but, in the long run for the man that he has for you please keep your virginity. You'll stay connected to the one you truely love deeply in that way.Brandon Robinsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00032337145839593405noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-27162508800737751152012-10-02T09:58:07.671-07:002012-10-02T09:58:07.671-07:00Wow again I love your posts, this one was funny! I...Wow again I love your posts, this one was funny! I'm a black nerd too and I have been in the middle of looking for dimes and failing to meet "available" black or mixed nerdy women (who are devoted christians). While I'm not a master in the area of attraction this I do know, regardless of what you percieve yourself to be (nerd, geeks, thug etc.) What really makes a person worthwhile is there conviction and willingness to look at the person's heart. 1 Sam 16:7<br />7 But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”<br /><br />From our heart is where we find the person's character. I believe the Lord will lead a good man for you soon, just continue to focus on your relationship with him.Brandon Robinsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00032337145839593405noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-52997552622783823812012-10-02T09:42:49.798-07:002012-10-02T09:42:49.798-07:00Hello! Your blog is very interesting and well writ...Hello! Your blog is very interesting and well written!<br />I'm in the same boat as i haven't dated since my previous relationship. I commend you that you've kept your virginity!<br />I think personally while it's a great thing to be proactive also holding back can be good as well. A great thing that we've been doing at my church is hanging out and meeting people in small groups. I provides a way to meet people, develop friendships, and get to know people for who they are while growing in relationship with Christ. Traditional dating opens doors for compromising behaviors and often peoples motives are wrong, but in a small group of like minded singles can create friendships and ultimately relationships based on the hearts of the person. Even though I havent found anyone yet, my small group from church has been a great blessing to me.Brandon Robinsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00032337145839593405noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-7761600767996699982012-09-29T14:49:27.096-07:002012-09-29T14:49:27.096-07:00I ask myself this question all the time. The reaso...I ask myself this question all the time. The reason it went so well this time with Frodo, I think, is because I pushed and pushed.. and he gave back. I was honest with him. Whether it'll work out in the long run is anyone's guess but if I never did anything, he wouldn't have tried to be in contact with me.<br />I'm just trying to let go of all these rules and just be honest because I'm finding that anyone who plays by them ends up unhappy. People who are easy going don't have a problem finding the right partners, the right jobs and a fruitful life.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-34097542789661485252012-09-29T14:44:19.831-07:002012-09-29T14:44:19.831-07:00I can't define virgin anymore. It's futile...I can't define virgin anymore. It's futile.<br />Honestly, I've never been anywhere beyond first base but I don't feel like Amy.<br />The virgin/non-virgin dichotomy is so inaccurate. There is a spectrum of virginity and some never fall out of the emotional virginity even when they have lost the technical one from the physical act.<br />I'm happy for you and Darcy :) Even the Wickhams of the world aren't bad if you keep a good head on your shoulders. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-7302093412656119282012-07-15T19:39:22.968-07:002012-07-15T19:39:22.968-07:00The crazy thing is I get the advice of "Stop ...The crazy thing is I get the advice of "Stop searching for love and let it find you, but if the girl isn't looking and I'm not looking, then how will we find each other? If the girl isn't looking for a guy, and the guy isn't looking for a girl, then what do they look for? How do they deal with their feeling of loneliness? I deal with my loneliness by searching for a partner... That's just how I am.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00026599530351603484noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-18796777927194583872012-07-12T08:59:01.673-07:002012-07-12T08:59:01.673-07:00Thanks for sharing, Casey. I've known several ...Thanks for sharing, Casey. I've known several guys who were virgins into their twenties. One is my age, late 20's, and still a virgin. He's had 2 longterm relationships over the past 10 years too! So just know that though virgin boys past the age of 16 are becoming more and more rare, they're out there. You are not alone.flamencokittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-18453999578967757542012-07-05T02:56:16.419-07:002012-07-05T02:56:16.419-07:00Your blog has touched me. I'm a 19 year old gu...Your blog has touched me. I'm a 19 year old guy, a big guy, not a grotesque fat beer gut looking guy, but a tall muscled...stocky? I guess is a term some people use?....I don't know. Anyways, I'm a virgin and I haven't given my first kiss away either. I live in a hick town back in the sticks in TN, it has been hard a time or two, but I'm so glad I've stuck it out and not given myself away. I'm pretty average looking I guess, I'm not necessarily unattractive, I'm just not as assertive as most guys I suppose. I'm proud of myself for staying firm to my beliefs and staying pure. I'm not a virgin due to any religious rules, nor do I consider it a religious act, I just want to live my life and be the man I'd be proud to know. I'm also what some girls would refer to as a "Nice guy" I've been labeled in that category several times. I have been having issues with girls being instantly turned off after learning I'm a virgin, I've found a few that were lenient to an extent and looked passed it, but when I said I hadn't kissed a girl, they got creeped out or something. It is not an easy thing to uphold, I stay very lonesome most of the time, and I have a lot of girl good friends or best friends, but no romantic girl friends. I think very highly of girls that admit to being a virgin, I think it's a very very good thing that there are others out there with the similar mindset. At one time I really was giving up hope on staying this way when I was 17, and dated this really desperate pretty girl that was very sexually active, but was really sweet, and I dated her for about.....2 hours I guess, and I felt so wrong for trying to pursue her with that mindset and I felt so guilty so I ended it as nicely as I could. (She was my first actual romanticish girlfriend) I'm one of maybe 2 or 3 virgins that I know, aside from some pre-teens lol. I have so many friends that put sex first in relationships and end up single with a kid, or married and short after divorced, or just plain flat miserable and hates the world and does not know why. I've been searching for a girl with the same sexual history as myself, and it's incredibly difficult, unless I settle for a girl that has so many physical or mental turnoffs, and if I come out and say what those turnoffs are people come right out and say I'm shallow and play the blame game, but everyone has standards they looks for. Anyways, I'm sorry for not having the fancy paragraph structures as everyone else, I'm not a writer nor an official blogger, I'm just a "weirdo" lol.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00026599530351603484noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-2862084289954868122012-01-02T03:28:39.901-08:002012-01-02T03:28:39.901-08:00Another informative blog… Thank you for sharing it...Another informative blog… Thank you for sharing it… Best of luck for further endeavor too.<br /><a href="http://www.eusuperpharmacy.com/" rel="nofollow">Kamagra UK</a>super pharmacyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16019564735659240999noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-46374837920006541022011-11-08T07:06:07.366-08:002011-11-08T07:06:07.366-08:00Why the hands off aura?
You got no honor/reputat...Why the hands off aura? <br /><br />You got no honor/reputation! Personal honor/reputation is always something sexual. (According to Fritz Zorn who died from psychosomatic reasons as a 32 yo virgin after writing his book "Mars" about it)<br /><br />This is a bit abstract to explain. But maybe an example can bring clarity: A whore is just as frowned upon as a virgin. This seems paradox, but it isn't. Sure, the first has tons of sex, the latter none. Why are they both frowned upon? <br /><br />The reason is that it does not count if you do or if you dont. It does rather count HOW PICKY YOU ARE... This constitutes societal honor/reputation.<br /><br />It took me ages to figure that out, but sadly it is true. I can even comprehend it today. <br /><br />Imagine a girl come to me and asks me out for a sexytime. I would just accept nearly anyone - but no jewish please ;) No serious: I mean a girl would hesitate as I am an easy prey. What will their friends say? etc.<br /><br />Damn I am 27 now, no sexual experience (got a gf in kindergarten but she soon went back to her country), no job, no higher education, living with parents. Its like my live stood still since 10 years, only my body ages. I got mental problems cause of childhood (dominant parents, living in alienated school) and slight Aspergersyndrome. You got to have optimal fair wind today to be happy.<br /><br />At least I got my political goals which give kinda shallow sense to my life. Viva la revolucion. But whats a revolution without love? I am just a shallow ghost, thats what I feel likeBlogspotWShttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10744852384198694772noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-57314998466207990312011-09-14T04:35:17.847-07:002011-09-14T04:35:17.847-07:00I've read a couple of your postings and they a...I've read a couple of your postings and they are a breath of fresh air. As one of those traditional "black nerds" (yes, sci-fi-, computer-, history-loving, academically-oriented type)you spoke about on an earlier posting, I find that focusing on one's self and developing one's own potential to be the best you can be is all that matters. As someone once told me, "You have to be the person you want to attract" (yeah, great advice but not advice is universally applicable).Beyond-The-Spectrumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05667211181316579607noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-69748586266986395042011-09-08T14:41:07.604-07:002011-09-08T14:41:07.604-07:00Thanks for the encouragement!
Well, no. I don'...Thanks for the encouragement!<br /><br />Well, no. I don't want to sleep with a lot of men. It'd be nice to count all the men I've slept with on one hand, or one finger, even.<br /><br />But I also don't see my virginity as this "gift" I must give to my future husband. I don't think my virginity is the greatest "gift" I can give a man. I'm more than the stuff between my legs.<br /><br />And it seems like most men don't care if you're a virgin anyway. I don't know if I want a man who, if I weren't a virgin, would judge me or see me as a sinner.<br /><br />Sex can't fix a bad relationship, but it can make a good relationship better. If the relationship is going well and we both want to get together, I'm not seeing the point in clinging onto the cherry at all costs.flamencokittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-63721741308246133812011-09-07T17:17:21.915-07:002011-09-07T17:17:21.915-07:00Growing up, I scoffed at the idea of only having s...Growing up, I scoffed at the idea of only having sex with one person, and thought that waiting until marriage was insane.<br /><br />Now that I'm older, the whole thing makes more sense to me. My husband and I didn't wait until marriage, but he is the only person I've ever had sex with. I don't regret that at all. I actually hate the idea of being with anyone else and have zero desire to do so.<br /><br />My ex-boyfriend was very religious and believed in the idea of abstinence until marriage. Back then, it was a struggle for me and when we broke up it was hard for me to realize that we'd never experience that together. Now, I'm just relieved that I didn't ruin that for him - I would have felt so guilty about it.<br /><br />I think that it's important to stay true to your beliefs, even if they are not my own. You'll find "the one" eventually and you won't regret your decision to wait.Amyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06232796917367150497noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-65367722323378180952011-08-24T10:50:33.988-07:002011-08-24T10:50:33.988-07:00That's a good point. Your profile should alrea...That's a good point. Your profile should already be written for your kind of guy anyway. I read somewhere else that you should basically pretend you are writing a letter to your "Mr. Right."flamencokittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-88928820138274355462011-08-24T07:03:55.448-07:002011-08-24T07:03:55.448-07:00I (mostly) agree! I think people SHOULD be specifi...I (mostly) agree! I think people SHOULD be specific, but the trick is learning how to be specific without coming across as overly picky or hard to please. <br /><br />When I was doing the OKCupid thing, I made sure to make my entire profile be geared toward attracting the right kind of guy...so when I got to the part about "You should contact me if..." I had no trouble saying, "...you can spell the contracting of you and are correctly."<br /><br />The guys who had a) gotten that far and b) "got it" where usually pretty great. :)The Naked Redheadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13625800809727846180noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-2831018761760901642011-08-23T22:34:00.788-07:002011-08-23T22:34:00.788-07:00Thanks Miss Pepper Potts! Looks like I need to get...Thanks Miss Pepper Potts! Looks like I need to get more into sports.flamencokittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-17360401698555741122011-08-22T20:52:59.839-07:002011-08-22T20:52:59.839-07:00UFC/MMA Fights or boxing matches.UFC/MMA Fights or boxing matches.Miss_Pepper_Pottshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00069458646462904655noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-52042634916140400412011-08-22T19:46:52.893-07:002011-08-22T19:46:52.893-07:00Thanks for the encouragement JD/TOV. I feel less w...Thanks for the encouragement JD/TOV. I feel less weird whenever I meet others in my situation through here.flamencokittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-85942164556152587162011-08-22T13:19:23.410-07:002011-08-22T13:19:23.410-07:00Car shows! Good idea.Car shows! Good idea.flamencokittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-87526408619438785962011-08-13T14:27:18.330-07:002011-08-13T14:27:18.330-07:00I often wonder the same thing. However, I have no...I often wonder the same thing. However, I have noticed lots of single guys at classic car shows (and car dealers) and huge golf events.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-8015119645342406132011-08-10T21:47:17.425-07:002011-08-10T21:47:17.425-07:00Well...you aren't alone.
I'm a guy in my t...Well...you aren't alone.<br />I'm a guy in my thirties who is in the same boat.<br />Thought about being a Catholic priest growing up. Now I'm more agnostic, but with the dating prowess of a priest.<br /><br />I think as long as we don't give up, there is hope.<br /><br />And I don't think the virginity issue scares the right people off. If they are vested it won't be a one time event...plenty of chances to improve applied knowledge.<br /><br />Hang in there!JD/TOVhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07495797472572796989noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-12529094544467216612011-07-01T19:53:09.769-07:002011-07-01T19:53:09.769-07:00Thanks rush. Sometimes I'm proud, sometimes I&...Thanks rush. Sometimes I'm proud, sometimes I'm ashamed or feel silly. I'm glad to hear there's a guy out there who is proud of being a virgin.flamencokittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665114298186254835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762173204618404507.post-48231955433350606412011-07-01T14:42:38.507-07:002011-07-01T14:42:38.507-07:00Hey ther iz nothing to get lonely or feel bad abt ...Hey ther iz nothing to get lonely or feel bad abt dis i am a guy n m still virgin to , m proud of dat , i hav not loosed it to sum girl who dont love me n will never . Hey ther iz nothing to get lonely or feel bad abt dis i am a guy n m still virgin to , m proud of dat , i hav not loosed it to sum girl who dont love me n will never .rushhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05035861320871158425noreply@blogger.com